You've all heard of buyer's remorse, right? That guilt that sucks you in after buying something either you may not have needed or shouldn't have spent the money on? Goodness knows that I don't even have to buy something to experience it since I tend to squirrel my money away whenever I can (have I mentioned I'm a tightwad?).
I swear I get it honest. Growing up, my parents worked very hard and although we were far from being high up in the middle class, we lived comfortably and always had what we needed. I would watch as my mom separated each week's paycheck into different categories: groceries, bills, gas, savings and no matter how little, always some "me" money. I like to credit her for my love of budgeting (well, maybe not love for, but definite recognition of importance).
Well, I'm starting to feel a little bridal remorse.
Justin and I were talking the one night when he asked if we could put a bigger house at the top of the priority list. I assured him that it was already there. He clarified though that he meant instead of three years out, more like next year. And as I shook my head and said that we could start looking next year but I doubted finances would allow for us to go forward with anything until 2012, I started thinking about our wedding. And how despite the fact I have a very defined (and non-extravegant) budget (that come hell or high water we will come in under) for the event, it would make it possible to get into a larger place (or at least buy some land to build) next year if we used our wedding budget money. And there's the rub. And the great debate.
We spend our lives trying to make the most sound and feasible decisions. There are those that say any large amount of money spent on something like a wedding is wasted because it's one day that you'll only take away the memories from, not a tangible object. It's not even a necessary evil like a car that depreciates upon buying. You just hand over your money to the vendors and after the photographs are taken, the food eaten and the dancing done, you stand as husband and wife just as you would should you have gone to the courthouse instead. Then there are those that say any amount of money spent on a day like that is worth every penny because of what it represents, and how it brings all your loved ones together to help celebrate one of the most important days of your life.
I understand both sides of the fence. And believe me, I've argued both sides in my head over and over again. Justin and I tried the idea of going to the courthouse with just our family and then "eloping" to somewhere with our friends to celebrate. But because of where everyone is in their lives (mostly in that babymaking stage), there's no guarantees we could have even a few of the people we would want to most share those moments with there, which for us slightly defeats the purpose. Yes, the main purpose is for us to join one another in marriage, but we want to be surrounded by those closest to us in doing so.
Our wedding budget would help make a downpayment on a new house, a piece of land, take a chunk out of Justin's school loans, pay off the small amount still owed on one of our vehicles, pay for the patio, tiling and hardwood that we still want to do to our current house. Or it can fund one day of happiness, joyful tears, meaningful looks, gathering of families, laughter, tipsy stories and dancing, cake smashing, and abundant love. And while one side of me says that the former is a more responsible life decision, my hopeless romantic self says that Justin and I are only going to do this once. And while marrying the man that I love will be a cherished memory in and of itself, sharing that day and it's on goings with those that have raised us, shaped us, supported us throughout our lives and our relationship is worth waiting a little bit longer on the tangible things.
And it'll just give me another good reason to squirrel my extra money away...
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